Short funny quotes about life

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VICEVersa?

by Kardan o.....o (hi)
(jamaica)

If life gives you lemons...shouldnt death give you prunes ?

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Why is it....?

by James
(London)

- Why is it that the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

- Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

- Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

- Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

- Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

- Why is it that to stop Windows XP, you have to click on "Start"?

- Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

- Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

- Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

- Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

- When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

- Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

- Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

- You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

- Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

- Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

- If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?